Tuesday, July 27, 2010

That "Fat" Skinny B!!! (Part 1)

I have this friend you see. She’s wonderful and I love her face off to death, but I find more and more that skinny people who think they are fat make me in-freaking-sane. Now, as most of you know, I tend to write in a professional and compassionate manner, but girls, how much can we possibly take of our friends ranting on and on that they are fat, plump, pudgie, or thick when they are none of the above? I can no longer do it.

There is something beautiful in every one of us. None of us are perfect. We need to accept that and move on. Yet, some people can’t. We all have that friend, the one who stops and glances in every mirror checking her hair, her profile, and her butt. We have that friend that lifts their shirt just a little to have a glance at their tummy and groan as they slap their non-existent pooch area. What is it that I’m supposed to say to this girl about her weight?

Truth is, I want to smack her. Smack her hard in the face with a loaded baked potato and tell her to eat it all, even the skin and make sure she drinks that entire glass of milk. Alas, I can’t. I don’t really feel like a restraining order will do much for my blogging or keeping my real job. But, what do we do? What do we say and more importantly, how do they feel about me if I’m twice their size?

Them: God, I am so fat! What the hell was I thinking when I ate... (fill in the dots here).
Me: Same thing I was – You were hungry
What I should of said – (You aren’t fat, you’re actually just out of your damn mind. You should have eaten two you skinny B!)

Them: Have you seen the size of my ass?!
Me: Have you seen the size of mine?
Then: Oh, shut up, that’s different.
(How the hell is it different? I way 150lbs more than you! That’s what the hell the difference is!)

Them: Grrr, do you see this roll?
Me: What roll? Your pants are too damn tight girl.
Them:  The pants are fine. I'm talking about this... this...This muffin-top!
Me: (You don’t have a muffin-top you ass, your pants are just a size too small.)



Monday, July 26, 2010

Check Out The Book of The Week!!!

Hey My Pretties,

I just read a great book full of awesome low-cal tasty food!!! Be sure to check it out in the Book of the Week Section!!!

Here's a sneak peek at what The View Thought!!!

Hungry Girl Happy Hour: 75 Recipes for Amazingly Fantastic Guilt-Free Cocktails and Party Foods
Please click on the book for more information!!!


I also have and love (Click on the photos for more info):
Hungry Girl 1-2-3: The Easiest, Most Delicious, Guilt-Free Recipes on the PlanetHungry Girl: 200 Under 200: 200 Recipes Under 200 CaloriesHungry Girl: Recipes and Survival Strategies for Guilt-Free Eating in the Real WorldHungry Girl Chew the Right Thing: Supreme Makeovers for 50 Foods You Crave

Saturday, July 24, 2010


Hey my beautiful ladies, it’s been some time since I last wrote you all and a lot has gone on but no worries. Big Fat Secrets is up and running and to show you how serious I am I’m giving away a great goodie pack full of some awesome accessories, make-up and other items that every beautiful woman needs. (You will need to provide me with a mailing address and contact information should you win).

When I started this blog I thought it was going to be about ranting, and yes, it will be, but the more I read my tweets from people, direct emails and messaging I’m finding that women who are beautiful on the inside and out and are wonderfully curvy just need a place to share ideas about life, beauty, fashion and fitness without being judged. I’ve had a lot of direct contact from you ladies.  So I welcome and encourage you to become part of this community. I will continue to answer you private but why not share the love?

This give-away will be basic (the first of many) and will be about introducing people to Big Fat Secrets and having them become part of our community. The contest will be on a point system (From Saturday July 24, 2010 to Saturday July 31st 12pm EST) where you will receive a:

  1. Point for every RETWEET that you post on Twitter in regards to the giveaway
  2. Point for every TWEET / RETWEET about the Big Fat Secrets Blog Page
  3. Point for every POST you make on the Big Fat Secrets Facebook Page
  4. Point for every COMMENT you make on the Big Fat Secret Blog Page about the blogs posted from July 24th to the 31st).
  5. Point for any direct message you send to me with blog suggestions, articles you’ve written, review you’ve done or a cute fashion pic you’d like to have highlighted. This can be posted to Big Fat Secrets anonymously if you like).
  6. Point for becoming a fan/follower of the Big Fat Secret Blog Page or Facebook.
(Additional points may be given at any time and I reserve the right to change, modify or adjust the give-away)

Why Can’t I Just Be Beautiful?

Why Can’t I Just Be Beautiful?

I made a Tweet just the other day on twitter about something that really bothers me about people in general and it seemed, from the number of RTs, direct messages and emails that I received that this seems to bother a number of women also. I want to know, why can’t I JUST be beautiful.

Now hold your horses there, I’m not a dog by any means, and I’m not drop dead gorgeous by any other. I’m just plain old me. I have big brown eyes, dark hair, nice skin and a round curvy body. I’m not thin or toned; I’m not in shape or perfect. I’m not ashamed of my body, I mean let’s face it, I made it this way and it’s not like people don’t know what I look like, but it’s more than that.

I got a call the other night from one of my best friends who is, interesting enough, dating my boyfriend’s best friend from high school. Anyway, while they were out with some old high school friends of her boyfriend someone asked what I was like. They of course talked about witty sense of humor and awesome personality but when asked what I looked like the response was, and I quote what one of my boyfriends male friends said was, “She has a real pretty face and big old boobs.”

Now, let me ask. Why the hell couldn’t he just have said I was pretty? I don’t understand this. Let me rephrase this, I don’t understand why it’s necessary to comment that my “face” is pretty. Isn’t that what it means to be pretty, that you are attractive in the face? The answer, my beautiful ladies, is YES.  Let me list the reasons why this happens:

  1. The size of my ass is too big
  2. The size of my shoulders are too broad
  3. The size of my stomach is not flat
  4. The size of my legs are thicker

LOL. Now, I know this is his attempt to say “She’s pretty but kind of fat” without actually calling me fat as my best friend was there, but sweet baby Jesus  - is it that big of a deal? I mean, I am pleasantly plump. If I had a nice body the response would have been “She’s hot,” but because I don’t, you mention that I have a “pretty face.”

Now, this is not the only time that this has happened to me this week. I go into JC Pennies for a pair of dress slacks for work and, as I’m sure you can tell, I’m very open about my body. I come out, loving the fit of the pants from mid thigh to floor but am unhappy that you can see every dimple in my ass. The sales associate asks me if I like them and I say, “They are a little snug in the rear, if only it was smaller.” I giggle. Her response? “ But you have such a cute face.” Cute? I am not 12 and what does my cute face have to do with my big ass? NOTHING. It’s a poor attempt to make me feel attractive because she is uncomfortable with my body more than I am.

  1. Never apologize for your body. Not to anyone and especially not to your self.
  2. Look at yourself naked. I know it’s scary but just do it. This is what you look like. Clothing does not change your size, your curves or the things you don’t like about it. People know what you look like and you are beautiful.
  3. Tell yourself you are beautiful – all of you. Even the parts you wish you didn’t have. Don’t say that just your face or your nice rack or great ass is what is beautiful about you. YOU are beautiful because it is part of you.
  4. Ignore people. They can be ignorant. I often find that most people are uncomfortable with their bodies and it’s just silly.
  5. Remember to tell yourself that you are beautiful – all of you and that your beauty on the inside will, and does, shine through. People will see that.

Confidence is part of this game we have to play since we have a little more to offer. Don’t ever feel like you don’t fit in anywhere because of your rocking body. Smile, have great posture and flirt a little. Why can’t you just be pretty? Because you’re not, you’re beautiful!

    Your Thoughts:
  1. What instances have you ran into like this?
  2. Do you find that people often refer to your face versus you?
  3. How do you feel/handle situations like this?

Trashy or Trendy

Trashy or Trendy

Ladies, ladies ladies. I am finding that some of you surprise me with your clothing choices. I want you all to be the confident beautiful women that you are but I’ve been finding more and more of you wearing clothing styles because they come in your size despite the fact that they don’t fit your body type. A good friend of mines daughter is a beautiful girl with some meat on her bones and informed me, through Facebook, that just because they make clothing styles in your size doesn’t mean that women should wear them. I agree. I’m not saying you have to but commit to TRYING ON ALL CLOTHING BEFORE YOU BUY!

Great examples:

The Skinny Jean – I’ve not seen many plus-size women pull this look off. Those that do so successfully are usually plus sized not because they are extra curvy or are a little heavy, these women are plus sized because they are just big. I don’t mean big in a negative way, but that they are long and thick. Because they have longer legs and torso, these women can pull off a slim jean with a narrow opening at the bottom. I urge you my beautiful ladies to please, with all your might steer clear of this fashion faux pas. Many of the plus size clothing lines carry these in our size but anything that is going to hug and narrow just one part of your body is going to accentuate all the bad parts.  If you are thin in the legs and heavy in the middle you too need to avoid this look. Although it may look good on your legs, the top will look oversized.

The One-Piece – I’ve seen a number of one piece / jumpsuit style short/pant sets floating out there also. I warn you, please avoid. If you are shopping in the plus size or extended size areas of clothing stores, this is one piece to try on, but know, that I’ve not seen one woman who can carry this off if she has a little cushion where cushion is normally found.

Super Low Cut tops – Ladies, I find that many of us girls who are perfectly plum have some pretty nice ta-tas for show. A little cleavage is always nice especially when perfectly placed breasts can make a waste seem thinner and hips more proportionate to the body. Boobs should still be considered a blessing and although many women follow the rule “It’s not a boob unless you see nipple,” not all people agree. Bathing suites are one thing but your shirt should show an appropriate amount of cleavage. Deep V’s and plunging necklines actually look great on women with less of a chest versus those with a huge chest. If your grandmother would be concerned that you may end up with a “chest cold” layer you shirt with a lacy camie or a buttoned cardigan. A little peep show is usually sexier than a strip tease.

Fashion is a little bit trickier for us. We just can’t look at something the way someone who is a little thinner does. We have to look at things like:
1.  Fabric – Does it lay nice? Coverage? Stretch?
            The way a fabric lays on you is really important. Cheap fabric like nylon and rayon and spandex        are not always the most flattering –even if they are comfy or trendy. When your body isn’t flawless these fabrics ride on your skin, so even if you wear black, people can see areas that you may want to hide. Designers love stretch and sheer material for larger women. Why? A little stretch is nice as it             hugs where sometimes fabric can sag, but taking a piece of fabric and making it thinner by stretching it over your body isn’t always flattering.
            Choose fabrics with a little weight and that are natural. The more shine and
            stretch they have the less quality and fit they will have.

2. Cut  - What does this mean?
            Look for fabric that has lines / cut that draw the eye in at the thinnest parts of your body. You want balance. If you have a big chest look for lines that draw in under the chest and don’t hug at the waist. If you have a big middle look for pants that are slightly larger at the bottom. Balance and proper fit to the body is important when you want to look as though you have style.

3.  Style – Classic should be essential
            This is the hardest rule for women to follow. Your main wardrobe can be fun but             remember that classics will always be just that – classy. Find good classic fitting clothing and then, from there add the funky trendy pieces. Many of the styles you find are going to be way over-priced so make them part of your wardrobe by adding them to the classics you already have. Keep in mind the fabric and cut.
            Look for classics like button-down, trouser jeans, good fitting slacks and jackets and add great shoes, jewelry and other essentials as you come across them. This doesn’t mean you have to be boring or all tailored and tan, just that the reason why classics are, well, classic is that they fit just about every body type and can be dressed up or down. Throw in risky items like             revealing camies, corset or nylons under these garments and show a little to spice it up. Find your style and rock it!

Your Thoughts:

  1. What have you seen that really works for plus size women?
  2. What have you seen that many plus size women do that’s just a mess?
  3. What tricks do you have to offer?